i make cowardly, myopic decisions.
i don't love that about myself.
i have been thinking
about why i
opted for business instead of fass.
there is a tinge of disappointment
that i eventually won't been
doing Arts and Social Science-
its like some sort of betrayal.
to be truthful,
business was never something
i ever considered.
i love my bucks but i
always proclaimed my dislike
for over-engaging in PR esp
in the coporate world.
but eventually it
became the result of elimination,
since anything remotely sciencey or
engineery looked absolutely vulgar to me.
since i didnt mind public speaking,
and could tolerate donning
chic office wear for life,
i decided, might as well sail
down this taken-to-death route.
quite honestly
if i didn't fare as devastatingly
as i did for my GP,
i would go for FASS without apprehension.
but so i did how i did,
and it seemed like a sign,
like i couldn't, shouldn't, wouldn't
be able to manage.
maybe how i feel about my inclination
towards the Arts is just a delusion,
maybe i can't really delve deep into
issues and dissect them like
i think i like to,
maybe i don't make so much
sense after all,
maybe i just can't really use the
English Languge...
its tragic how attainable
this dream is,
yet at the same time,
so unattainable.
it is also annoying the sort
of commonplace perception of the Arts.
their semblances when
i/my friends
express interest in going to FASS,
it's as if im about to embark on
a suicide mission and a route
to unemployment.
they will question me about
what i would do with the degree,
or more colloquially
"arts come out do what?!"
with the same deep, bemused frown.
i do believe every course and faculty
will serve its purpose in the society,
and i dont suppose any
university tailors a
course to bring you down
your road to doom.
BUT
i do believe that to be employed,
you need to be at least,
competent in your field of study.
AND by saying that i chose
biz over fass as a result of
weighing the odds of employment,
i mean to say that i
am more likely to be a
competent bizgrad than an arts grad.
i may be wrong, i may not
be competent at all-
but it's what i see from
where i am, now.
i figure there's more
room in this society for me
as a mediocre business graduate
than a terrible arts/social sci graduate.
and so business is
the utilitarian and sensible,
yet grossly conventional,
option that facilitates my hope
to give my
parents their
early+unabashedly luxurious
retirement.
yeah,
the plan is to obtain my
music diploma and business degree
by the time i hit 22 (or thereabout).
then i'll figure what to
do with life.
meanwhile,
i am envious of all you people
who are on your way to
realising your dreams.
i wish i could be so
gungho but i can't be
since im so highly cynical and
imbued with my principles of
security and convenience.
PEACE TO THE WORLD!
1:33 PM